Starting Over!

Life can be overwhelming sometimes. I feel like I have a good groove going with my Gastroparesis. It bothers me, but I fight back. It attacks my immune system but I have more control over it than I have ever had. However, that does not mean immunity from other issues. I have definitely had my fair share of trials. 

Over the past month or two, I have been hit with a lot of changes, most which were very unexpected. I do okay with change sometimes. When I have notice. Or I am expecting it. Anyways, I have found myself at the end of my rope. It has been hard to deal with all the changes while still trying to remain positive.

Then I look at others who are battling their personal battles with chronic conditions, disabilities, injuries, or difficult times. It is hard to see others struggle or see even see the trials they are going through. However, I have come to the conclusion that many times, while dealing with challenges, we need to take a step back, look around, analyze the situation and start over. 

With that being said, I'd like to make an announcement:

I am in the middle of starting over. I have chose three words to focus on this year (see my personal blog for more information on those) and believe that those will help me to get stable footing on solid ground. While thinking about how hard this starting over process has been, a song came to mind.

The Middle of Starting Over  - Sabrina Carpenter

Cast out to sea
Drifting with the tide
And no way of finding me
Now that I'm free
Nothing but blue skies
Paradise in front of me

Awake from this dream
I hold my breath and just believe

Tired of all the troubles
They've been wasting my time
I don't wanna fight
Gonna leave it behind
Taking on faith
Now I'm ready to fly
I'm in the middle of starting over
Back to the beginning
Gonna hit rewind
Chance to do it over
To get it right this time
Life gives you pennies
Turn them into dimes
I'm in the middle of starting over

Alone, in a room
Tearing down the walls
Painting over scars and bruises
Now, this is home
Fill it up with love
And make the best of something new, yeah

As hard as it seems
I hold my breath and just believe

The colors in the stars
Seem a little brighter
Tomorrow isn't far away!
Through the hardest part
I'm working towards a happy ending

Tired of all the troubles
They've been wasting my time
I don't wanna fight
Gonna leave it behind
Taking on faith
Now I'm ready to fly
I'm in the middle of starting over
Back to the beginning
Gonna hit rewind
Chance to do it over
Get it right this time
Life gives you pennies
Turn them into dimes
I'm in the middle of starting over

(https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RLcdPpjKKH )

At first, I just thought this song was a catchy melody. When I listened to the words, I realized it was so much more and it goes deep. Sometimes starting over is the best thing to do in any situation. Last night, I was doing a puzzle with some friends. We all stepped back from the table and came back. As soon as we were back, we found and put together more pieces. It was proof that stepping back during hard situations helps. I believe the song explains what I want to say so much better than I could ever. 

We can break down walls, paint over bruises and scars, take on faith, hold our breath and believe. It's not easy, but in the end, starting over is just what we may need.